Of Pigeons And Pecking
9am, HSB 316
Psychology 203 : Learning and Behaviour
We train pigeons. Yeap. We train them to respond to 3 different lights in a row, and, depending on the experiment, some of them learn really fast. Basically, in one of the experiments, you peck this light, you get food. You peck these lights in this sequence, you get food. You do the cha-cha, peck those lights, and challenge each other to Dance Dance Revolution and get a score of Sizzlin!, you get food. Positive reinforcement rewards for their actions and learned behaviour. But that ain't so much the fun part.
See, the fun part is getting them out of their home chambers and into the experimental chamber.
Their home chambers are located a couple of rooms away from the experimental chamber where we can monitor them as they peck/eat/crap/do anything via camera linked to TV and computer.
Basically, we have to get them out of their cages. Which means, we have to grab them. Which also means some people get scared, scream, the birds go crazy, and havoc and mayhem ensue. Of course, the area is secure, unless someone had, by some sort of weird chance, opened the door while a pigeons loose...
All I can say in my defense is, "Whoops, my bad..."
After we 'acquire' the pigeons gently and gracefully, we shove them into a plastic jug.
Yeah, plastic jug. You can put beer in it. That kind of jug.
And then we weigh it, see if the weights all nice and good, and if not, feed it more ( we can't feed it less because thats, apparently, unethical... )
After that, we transport them to the experimental chambers, 'pour' them out into a chamber and pretty much lock'em up in there. Then we commence the experiment, we get results, happy happy joy joy, we take them back, and take another batch of birds. Rinse, and repeat.
And contrary to popular belief, we do not train the pigeons to crap on people.
Really, we don't. Well, maybe only to people we don't like. And politicians.
I apologise on behalf of all Stage 2 Psychology students if there are, indeed, any pigeons perpetrating these foul crappings. We did not unleash them knowing that they might exhibit such dirty behaviour. Please forward any formal complaints to the Head of Dept of Psychology via reception at level 3 of the Human Sciences Building.
Double Impact...
...sucks to the max. Why Jean Claude van Damme!?!? WHY!?
Basically, two twins, separated at birth, team up 30 years later to go and kick the crap out of an evil Hong Kong business man who murdered their father. In terms of plot, that’s it…But wait. There’s comedy too. Chad (Van-Damme number one) is a camp yoga teacher (who can also do the splits and Kick-box) and Alex (Van-Damme number two) is a hardened cigar smoking arms smuggler in Hong Kong (who can also do the splits and kick-box).
Weirdly enough, when he’s playing the camp twin and mincing about in hardened sailor bars wearing pink shorts and a lavender polo, he actually comes as near to acting as I think he’s got...
Things you'll learn from this movie:
Left: "Please don't shit on me!" cries evil triad thug bad person guy as he gets an up close and personal view of some Jean Claude van DAMN! This is before the scene where evil triad thugamajigger throws himself into a conveniently placed burning pit of molten... stuff, in an apparent fit of suicide. Too much of Jean Claude van Damme can kill. Kinda like Chuck Norris... Actually...
If Chuck Norris had a fight with Jean Claude van Damme, who would win?
Oh, and I nearly forgot to mention : Chad, after getting beaten up by some evil mook, describes him to his brother...
"He had a scar down the right side of his face"
...and runs his finger down the left side of his face...
Dubble-yew, Tee, Eff?!?!
One sided conversations
Dude, you watched that pieceoshit movie?
I didn't know it'd be THAT bad...
You. Are. An. Idjit.
Yeah, well, least now I know to stay away from van Damme movies
Did you like him in the tights? Huh? huh huh huh gay boy
?! Shutup I didn't know he'd be in tights!
Liar, you knew he'd be in pink shorts and a lavender polo too, ya homo
I didn't think the movie would be THAT bad! I never expected such... GAY-ness...
Oh but I'm sure you're familiar with all o that, gay boy!
Will you be quiet?! I made a mistake alright?! MY BAD!
Sure-gay-, what-gay- ever-gay- you-gay- say-gay-...
Can you EVER be quiet?! At all!?
gaygaygaygaygaygaygay giggedy giggedy gay gay gay gay
Oh, what are you now? Quagmire? You philistine! Begone!
First, I'm not from the Phillipines, and second, I can't go, I'm in your head, remember? Ya numbnut
...(Insert expletives here)!?!?!!...
Currently listening to:
Ben Folds Five - Magic - its a nice piano song, me likey piano
Nickelback - Saving Me - more rockier than So Far Away, all the same, me likey
Sigur Ros - Hoppípolla - really, this song is... peaceful? I don't know how to describe it
BT - Superfabulous - catchy, the techno will grow on you
9am, HSB 316
Psychology 203 : Learning and Behaviour
We train pigeons. Yeap. We train them to respond to 3 different lights in a row, and, depending on the experiment, some of them learn really fast. Basically, in one of the experiments, you peck this light, you get food. You peck these lights in this sequence, you get food. You do the cha-cha, peck those lights, and challenge each other to Dance Dance Revolution and get a score of Sizzlin!, you get food. Positive reinforcement rewards for their actions and learned behaviour. But that ain't so much the fun part.
See, the fun part is getting them out of their home chambers and into the experimental chamber.
Their home chambers are located a couple of rooms away from the experimental chamber where we can monitor them as they peck/eat/crap/do anything via camera linked to TV and computer.
Basically, we have to get them out of their cages. Which means, we have to grab them. Which also means some people get scared, scream, the birds go crazy, and havoc and mayhem ensue. Of course, the area is secure, unless someone had, by some sort of weird chance, opened the door while a pigeons loose...
All I can say in my defense is, "Whoops, my bad..."
After we 'acquire' the pigeons gently and gracefully, we shove them into a plastic jug.
Yeah, plastic jug. You can put beer in it. That kind of jug.
And then we weigh it, see if the weights all nice and good, and if not, feed it more ( we can't feed it less because thats, apparently, unethical... )
After that, we transport them to the experimental chambers, 'pour' them out into a chamber and pretty much lock'em up in there. Then we commence the experiment, we get results, happy happy joy joy, we take them back, and take another batch of birds. Rinse, and repeat.
And contrary to popular belief, we do not train the pigeons to crap on people.
Really, we don't. Well, maybe only to people we don't like. And politicians.
I apologise on behalf of all Stage 2 Psychology students if there are, indeed, any pigeons perpetrating these foul crappings. We did not unleash them knowing that they might exhibit such dirty behaviour. Please forward any formal complaints to the Head of Dept of Psychology via reception at level 3 of the Human Sciences Building.
Double Impact...
...sucks to the max. Why Jean Claude van Damme!?!? WHY!?
Basically, two twins, separated at birth, team up 30 years later to go and kick the crap out of an evil Hong Kong business man who murdered their father. In terms of plot, that’s it…But wait. There’s comedy too. Chad (Van-Damme number one) is a camp yoga teacher (who can also do the splits and Kick-box) and Alex (Van-Damme number two) is a hardened cigar smoking arms smuggler in Hong Kong (who can also do the splits and kick-box).
Weirdly enough, when he’s playing the camp twin and mincing about in hardened sailor bars wearing pink shorts and a lavender polo, he actually comes as near to acting as I think he’s got...
Things you'll learn from this movie:
- van Damme is an idiot. Both of them.
- If someone grows up in hong kong, he adopts an american accent. If someone grows up in america, he adopts a french accent.
- You can get shot in the face from point blank range and only get a spider scar and 1 blue contact lense from it.
- A mercedes will automatically explode if you shoot at the trunk after dumping it into the ocean.
- Always end a movie with a early 90s rap song with the chorus having something to do with the movie's title playing during the credits... "Gonna feel the impact... OF MY SOUL! OF MY SOUL!"
Left: "Please don't shit on me!" cries evil triad thug bad person guy as he gets an up close and personal view of some Jean Claude van DAMN! This is before the scene where evil triad thugamajigger throws himself into a conveniently placed burning pit of molten... stuff, in an apparent fit of suicide. Too much of Jean Claude van Damme can kill. Kinda like Chuck Norris... Actually...If Chuck Norris had a fight with Jean Claude van Damme, who would win?
Oh, and I nearly forgot to mention : Chad, after getting beaten up by some evil mook, describes him to his brother...
"He had a scar down the right side of his face"
...and runs his finger down the left side of his face...
Dubble-yew, Tee, Eff?!?!
One sided conversations
Dude, you watched that pieceoshit movie?
I didn't know it'd be THAT bad...
You. Are. An. Idjit.
Yeah, well, least now I know to stay away from van Damme movies
Did you like him in the tights? Huh? huh huh huh gay boy
?! Shutup I didn't know he'd be in tights!
Liar, you knew he'd be in pink shorts and a lavender polo too, ya homo
I didn't think the movie would be THAT bad! I never expected such... GAY-ness...
Oh but I'm sure you're familiar with all o that, gay boy!
Will you be quiet?! I made a mistake alright?! MY BAD!
Sure-gay-, what-gay- ever-gay- you-gay- say-gay-...
Can you EVER be quiet?! At all!?
gaygaygaygaygaygaygay giggedy giggedy gay gay gay gay
Oh, what are you now? Quagmire? You philistine! Begone!
First, I'm not from the Phillipines, and second, I can't go, I'm in your head, remember? Ya numbnut
...(Insert expletives here)!?!?!!...
Currently listening to:
Ben Folds Five - Magic - its a nice piano song, me likey piano
Nickelback - Saving Me - more rockier than So Far Away, all the same, me likey
Sigur Ros - Hoppípolla - really, this song is... peaceful? I don't know how to describe it
BT - Superfabulous - catchy, the techno will grow on you
About me
- I'm JSoh
- From Auckland, New Zealand
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