The incident with the caffeine rocket and the spanish zombies...

... and other stories...
First of all, apologies for not posting lately.

The Caffeine rocket
Its 4.30am. I'm barely awake. I've been tossing and turning the whole night, and I can't sleep.
My body is tired, but my mind just can't seem to settle down and shut up.
Its like I've got a lil Jiminy Cricket, just constantly yakking into my ear.
Oh well. Do something. Might as well. I sure ain't sleeping for the rest of the morning.
And so I get up from the compost heap that is my bed, a bit too fast, and the blood rushes to my head. I shake it off but I just make it worse.
My eyes feel like they've been glued shut, and I'm having difficulty opening them. I blindly make my way to the kitchen, try and make something to wake me up.
Mug. Hot water. Bread.
Feels like I'm missing something.
And then I realise I forgot to grab the 3 in 1 instant coffee.
I stumble into the pantry and grab the 3 in 1.
Due to severe retardedness, I don't manage to rip apart the seal, and instead, have to spend extra time hunting for a pair of scissors.
While I am doing this, I begin to recall and episode of Mr. Bean rushing to work.
He's obviously late, and somehow manages to drink his coffee by mixing all the contents in his mouth.
I don't think.
Once its open, I tip the contents of the sachet into my mouth.
Hilarity ensues. The taste is indescribable. My face is just scrunched up, an explosion of bitterness shattering my tongue.
I don't think.
I grab the mug and down whatevers init, hoping to get rid of the bittersweet bittersweetness.
Freshly boiled water makes its way into me. I scream. And I mean really, really scream.
As in "OMG I JUST DOWNED FRICKIN BOILING WATER AAAAAAAAA SOMEONE OH SHITE ITS SO HOT AAAAHAAA" scream.
And as I scream, some of it makes it way up my nose. You know how it is.
I run to the fridge and grab the milk, tear the carton, and down half a litre.
I feel like I've melted my insides, and froze them again. I feel mangled.
I can't believe I even trusted Mr. Bean in the first place.
Damn you Bean. Damn you.

Spanish zombies...
...don't run that fast. They more or less just lumber around.
"Te voy matar!"
"Matenlo!"
Which pretty much means "I'm going to kill you!" and "Kill him!" in Spanish. Meh, no biggie.
I pick up the Punisher, some kind of weird semi-auto, given to me by an eccentric merchant I met just a while ago. I load it up, cock it, and I'm ready.
The first one comes, bearded and raggedy, reeking of death. I wonder if he's dead already.
I aim at his head, and bang. He's staggering, clutching his left eye, but moments later, recovers, and starts slowly making his way towards me again, arms outstretched.
His left eye is dangling by the nerve endings.
I shoot at his head again, and somehow, his head explodes. His body crashes to the ground.
But while all this is happening, I fail to realise that a whole crowd of maybe 10,15 of them have crowded around me.
"Te voy a romper en pedazos!" - "I'm going to break you into pieces"
"Muere! Muere!" - "Die! Die!"
Ok, time for the big guns.
I bring out the single barrel pump action shotgun. I load a couple of shells in and I blast away.
And they all pretty much fly 10 feet away from where they were.
I suddenly hear his splattering noise, this little explosion, as if someones gut just exploded.
But I ignore this, and instead, aim at the chainsaw wielding maniac in front of me, who pretty much looks down the barrel of my shotgun as I pull the trigger. Half of his face is gone, and he's blown back, but still standing, albeit jst barely.
And then I am stabbed from behind. I jump from the pain, and am momentarily distracted by the rabid woman who has just plunged her kitchen knife into my back.
The backstabber gets one in the kneecaps, and then one in the face, just for that.
And then, all I see is the blade of a chainsaw, and a lot of blood. My blood. It only takes about 2 seconds to fully decapitate me.
My body slumps to the ground, head resting beside, Mr. Chainsaw roaring in victory.
Everything is dark now.






And thus was the experience of my first death in Resident Evil 4.
Honestly, its such a good game. If any of you out there have a PS2 or a Gamecube, buy it.
If any of you out there who don't have a PS2 or a Gamecube, buy either one, and then buy Resident Evil 4.

Intelligent conversations, as of late

(Ashlyne, Angela Lai, Me)
Angela: Hey (to me), you're born in '87, thats the year of the Rabbit right (refer to Zodiac)?
Ashlyne: (listening in) Haha, woof woof!
Me: ... *sigh*

(Mathu, Wei Fei, Me)
Mathu: So yeah, Justins lactose intolerant
Me: Which means basically he can't take anything that has milk in it, like milk from a cow-
Wei Fei: Wait, does that mean he can't eat cow?
Mathu, Me: *slaps face in unison*

Lastly...

The Time Traveler's Wife - Audrey Nifenegger

Loosely based on Homer's Odyssey, it centers on a relationship between Clare Abshire and Henry DeTamble, the latter with a time-travelling gene that enables him to leapfrog into different periods of time in different places. This 'ability' cannot be controlled, and Henry cannot choose when and where to go.
But what do you do when you meet the love of your life when you are 6? And he's 36?
(Henry is 36, time travels back to the past, and meets a 6 year old Clare, who has just met her future husband from a different time. In real time, which is Clares present, Henry is only 8 years older than her, but the 36 year old Henry is from a different time)
And so, Henry disappears from his present time, and appears either in the future or the past, completely naked and bare. He has to rely on thieving, fighting, hiding, and for the most part, running, to keep himself alive.
Imagine, you're having your lunch, just like any other day, on a bright sunny summer morning. The sun is warm on your skin, and as you look up, you're suddenly overwhelmed by a force, and your ears are ringing, and you're thinking 'Whats going on?' and suddenly *poof*, you're stark naked in the middle of a deserted road, on a cold a winter night.
You look around, but the only thing illuminating the streets is the light from the streetlamps. You are scared, you are cold. Maybe this isnt real. Maybe its all just a dream.
But its not. You're Henry DeTamble. You've dealt with this for most of your life.
Until the day you die. Yes, you know the future, since you have, of course, traveled to it before.
But can you change it? Can you change the future of yourself?
Henry's mother died in a car accident when he was a small boy. He often goes back in time to see her, although all he can do is watch from a distance. At the same time, he's also traveled back too often to the fateful day that took his mother from his life. He can't change the future. His mother has to die. And he can't do a thing about it.

I really don't want to write anymore about the book, for fear of spoiling too much.
But seriously, if anyone has the time, read it. Theres so many parts to it where its just raw, straight emotion.
This book will make you glow, this book will make you laugh, and this book will make you cry.
Its a good book. Go get it now. Do it. Do it.


Oh not because happiness exists,
That too-hasty profit snatched from approaching loss.
But because truly being here is so much; because everything here apparently needs us, this fleeting world, which,
in some strange way keeps calling to us. Us, the most fleeting of all.

...Ah, but what can we take along
into that other realm? Not the art of looking,
Which is learned so slowly, and that nothing that happended here. Nothing
The sufferings, then. And above all, the heaviness,
and the long experience of love, -just what is wholly
unsayable

-from The ninth Duino Elegy,
Rainer Maria Rilke,
Translated by Stephen Mitchell

Bigger, Longer and Uncut...

... describes how this post will be...

Malaysia was, in a few words, fun, sad, and unforgettable
And how couldn't it be? I hadn't been back for nearly 4 years
Missed all my friends, thru all that time
And of course, I missed alot of what has happened as well...

Anyway, back to the details on what I've done whilst in Malaysia:

Stayed over at Harolds. I remember all those times when we used to stay over at peoples place, always stayin up all night talking a whole lot of shit. Oh and also talking bout girls. I'm sure Harold remembers the 'Jess-o-mania' that was happening around that time? =) Hehe, good times... But it was good stayin at your place man, really appreciate it.

Stayed over at Joshuas. I think I've mentioned this in the last post, but oh well, I'll just mention it again anyway. Stayin at Joshuas was good too, hadn't actually stayed at his place before. Full of talking about chicks and other private stuff ( which I shall not detail here of course ). Read thru all his yearly diaries too. Dude, your 2000- 2003 diaries are like some sort of super-emo rollcercoaster ride. And I hope to God you ain't still like that... lol

Christmas Eve. Was spent at Friendster Cafe, near the Curve, at 1Utama ( which, I might add, is really really massive and includes the indoor rock climbing place ). Heaps of people were there, Hui Yin, Mei Yan, Shing, Ying Roe, Jessamine and her cousin, Hock Keat, Ivan, to name some. Ended up playing with the toned down version of spin the bottle i.e. if the bottle pointed at you, you had to do a dare. I ended up having to do 10 jumping jacks in the middle of the busy restaurant ( Friendster Cafe is not exactly a cafe as such, its more... classy and expensive, so you know, its kinda like a posh cafe... which was quite busy at the time... Oh yeah, shops in Malaysia don't close for Christmas Eve, Christmas, or New Years Eve, New Years, and the day after New Years... and they don't close til 10pm, restaurants/cafes open for very much longer, if they close at all... ). Humiliating as it was, I had fun. Even had my name ( in chinese ) made from glowsticks and some party poppers ( what the heck are those things called anyway? )

Christmas. Was spent with Joshuas extended family at first. Later on that night, went to Mei Yans place. Had a good time there, sang some carols ( which was half heartedly sung by most of the guys there ), did that lil childrens game which involved clapping hands and signs and... meh, its too hard to describe, but basically the loser had to do stupid dares. Then, came the present exchange. I got some hair sculting product of some sorts ( heck I hardly know anything about haird products ). But I then managed to change it to a mug with cartoony soccer players on it... Shit, now I know what I forgot to pack! Josh, I think that mug is still at your house! And I'm not joking!

YC Camp. It was a good camp, met new friends there, like Jack, Sook Lin, along with meeting some old friends like Alvin, from LaSalle Primary, hadn't seen him in a looong time ( ever since I left primary, actually ). Didn't manage to ask the guest speakers ( Matt Garner from Oz, and some other Aussie guy whose name I can't remember cuz he didn't do much ) questions and stuff, since they were stayed up most of the time in their bungalow atop a hill. I have alot of questions. Then, I had a fever on the last day of camp. It was actually quite bad, didn't feel the best for most of the day ( even though I got up, while we were waiting in the hall before moving out of Peacehaven, to play takraw ), didn't want people to worry about me. Everyone else looked kinda tired anyway. Took about 7 or 8 panadols that day ( 3 in the morn, 2 or 3 in the afternoon, and either 2 or 3 more at night... I didn't count lol ). Didn't sleep that well that night ( Really high fever, you know how sometimes you get all restless/delusional ), but pretty much recovered the next day or so.

New Years day. Met Angel at her church that day. Shes really nice and friendly, and, for lack of better words, soft and demure. You know, like the kind of girl that you'd bring to your parents. Haha, Josh, you a lucky man. Spent the evening at Josh's uncles place writing into Josh's emo filled diary. I had to un-emo-fy it. Of course, I failed miserably.

Spent the last few days of my holidays with my Grandma in Kajang. Even though I didn't do much, I spent most of the time resting. Needed it badly.

Movies I've watched in Malaysia :

King Kong : Kong is the man/ape. I mean, you try and take on a couple of them Venatosaurus Rexs ( Yeah, they're not Tyrannosaurus, as many people have thought... I feel like such a nerd *snort* ). A couple of cans of whup-ass later ( Dammit man, Kong actually ripped one of their faces apart, I mean, c'mon, try thinking of your jaw just breaking like that ), Kongs just like " See now bee-yatch?! You see what I can do!? And now you gonna friggin deny me my right to make you stay?!! You ungrateful -" *Kong turns away from Naomi Watts*...

The Chronicles of Narnia : Half the time thruout the movie, I was expecting the older Pevensie girl to just say "Come on Harry!" in a vaguely Hermione-esque way. It was very Lord of the Rings and Harry Potter-ish, but it was basically very true to the book. It was quite a good movie. Except for the fact that the White Witch had bloody Polar bears as horses in the big battle scene. Polar bears?!!? Wtf?!? Where'd she pull that shit out of from?! And, if you have the DVD ( pirated, or not :p ) then in one of the scenes just after Aslan ( Qui-Gon Jinn in disguise of course, the Jedi are everywhere!!! Heck, Aslan even looked like Qui-Gon ) announces that that little rut Edmund has been cleared of his treachery bla bla bla, you can see a gorilla in the background along with the rest of the cast, celebrating. Thats right. A gorilla. Among all those cool animals ( they had Centaurs, cheetahs, tigers etc. ), they had a gorilla?!!

Perhaps Love : A chinese Moulin Rouge. Quite good I'd say, but it would've been better if I didn't have to resort to reading the subtitles since the movie was entirely in Cantonese. Only one main character could really sing well, and that was... I can't even remember his name. Andy Lau? I don't kno... And Takeshi Kaneshiro... well... I know someone out there likes him :p but, sad to say, he can't really sing ( sorry Mei Yan ). Basically revolves around these 2 guys who like this girl, 1 guy has had a past relationship with her when she wasn't a big movie star, and when she later became real famous and accomplished, left him to pursue her career, but still loves him, but then ... its a whole great big mess, I can't really explain it too well without incurring the wrath of some who adore this movie, so I'm just gonna... Yeah, leave it... there...

And the flight back...

...wasnt too bad I guess... Could've been a whole lot worse...
But basically the whole time I was alone, after my grandma and uncle saw me off, I was very... I don't know, detached? Alone? Its sort of like the feeling you get when you're alone in such a big crowded place, and all you wanna do is explore and look around...
And I had about and hour and a half to do whatever I wanted so...
I boarded the aerotrain to the departure terminal ( I was really early, so it was pretty empty, save for a man in a suit and a couple and their baby ), and just basically explored the whole place. Got some stuff from duty free ( chocolates and some Benedictine ).
All the while, listening to my MP3 player. Soft music, as I call it, like Easy Tonight by Five For Fighting, Two Beds and a Coffee Machine by Savage Garden, Angel by Sarah Maclachlan. It was kinda emo I guess. Didn't really wanna leave and all. You wouldn't really know the feeling even if I did describe it. And already, I started missing her. Ever since she went away, didn't even get to talk to her much when I was there with her. Hopefully she'll still be around when I come back... Whenever I come back next...

Now, its at this point that I would normally go on a tangent about... well, how I miss people and stuff, but I think I've already said it one too many times, and I'm not one for emo, so I'm just gonna leave it.

And back in New Zealand...

Well, the house, for one thing, has changed a little. Mom rearranged the furniture, we got a new chair swing, and a bean bag. A PINK bean bag. PINK. What were my parents thinking when they bought it?!!?! And its not like light pink, its really, quite bright PINK! But oh well, not that I'm gonna be using it much anyway. It feels good to be back in NZ, back home.
But where is home for me?
My mom asked me, if I could stay in NZ or Malaysia, which country would I choose to stay in?
And I couldn't answer that question. I was just stuck. Of course, I normally came up with some smart remark to bum her out, like I normally do, but this time, I didn't really have an answer.
And I still don't. Oh well...
*drops random quote*
"Only time will tell"

Thats all for now I guess.
*sigh*